MY LIfe In A Pickle Jar

surrounded by cucumbers

Friday, April 27, 2007

Farewell to the Panthers


I was going to sit here and write about how my youth was, how much trouble I got into, and all sorts of stuff about the crazy janitor. Unfortunately, I am really at a loss for words. My elemantary school burned down yesterday due to an electrical problem. That was my school. A lot of my older cousins went there and all throughout the halls were class photos starting from the 50's. This was the place where I had my first kiss, first fight, first cigarette, and first serious trouble with authority. I had been beaten up, been yelled at, kicked in the face with a soccer ball, spent hours in my own private "office" aka boot room, and made friends that to this day I still keep in some sort of contact. (By the way, sorry I am really lazy and hate the phone) As much as I hated it, I'm going to miss it.

-Pickle

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Bitch Please


How come we never see any White & Boring hair products ?


Friday, April 20, 2007

Everyone's bitin my shit



So you're out at the bar and wondering "How do I approach the ladies without looking like a douche?" Well my friend I have the answer for you. Gone are the days of asking people to dance. Now, they will flock to you. With moves like this how can you go wrong?

-Pickle

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

My birthday is only 8 months and 13 days away

And I really, really want this. If anyone is going to the US or Japan can you please get me this? I will love you forever and ever.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Nothing Says I love You Quite Like It


So you're having a hard time getting people to take you serious. Why not tattoo you're face? Now thanks to the good folks at Fecal Face you no longer have to pay big bucks for a shitty tattoo to show everyone how much you love this band or your current girlfriend. You can do it for almost free.

-Pickle

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

I'm ritch beeyatch


It's Tax time again. What am I to do with my huge return of $30.00 ? I don't know. Here's what I came up with:


- Get the deluxe car wash and actually vacuum it out for once.

- Treat myself to a good beer.

- Get my hair cut somewhere other than Great Clips, as the "fat kid hair" is pretty bad right now.

- Start a liquor cabinet. The Easter Bunny was pretty nice and gave me 2 bottles of wine to start it off so maybe I should add to that.

- Buy some sweet "art".

- I could finally get that Michael Jackson shirt I always wanted.


I could do all of that, but I'll probably just get some oregano and have a good weekend.



Thursday, April 05, 2007

Ballin on a Budget


I don't know why I do it. $3.00 Lucky's, wow what a great idea. I know what's going to happen to me, I won't get drunk, I'll sleep in, and my head will be pounding until about 1:00 in the afternoon. The problem is I can't pass up a deal. I have a closet full of "sale" items, drawers full of toys, and a wall full of Chinatown DVD's. I just can't pass up a good deal. Of the countless price orientated purchases I have made these three stand out the most: Minidisc player, footwear, and cheap alcohol.

The minidisc player was purchased on one of those great days after I first got a credit card. Back then I kept track of what was put on it and made sure to pay it off as quickly as I could. The sweet part about minidiscs was that they never caught on in North America. The shitty part, they never caught on in North America. Sure you could get one for cheap, however, the discs themselves, not cheap. I used it for about one summer, now it sits in a pile next to a couple of busted Ipods, Walkman, and a Discman.
I love shoes and probably have more pairs than the average person should. My problem with shoes though, is that they are all the same pairs and almost all of them cost under $50.00. When I find something I like I tend to stick with it. That is why I have about 6 pairs of slip ons, 3 pairs of Velcro shoes, and countless pairs of plain and simple skate shoes. The worst part about all of this is that I only wear 3 pairs of them.
Probably the most regretful purchase though have been cheap booze. Still to this day I do it. $5.50 for a six pack, why not. What's that, that cheap vodka that tastes like paint thinner is only $8.90, bring it on. I know what it will do to me. It's done it to me plenty of times before. Yet, I just can't resist. I can't resist that part of my brain that says "Hey, you'll hate me in the morning, but your wallet will love me for it now." I just can't say no to that reasoning. And you know what? It's going to happen again and again and again........

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Saan: More than Cheap Crap

Quite possibly the best part about small towns is the small department stores that are in them. Where else can you find awsome track suits, nascar underwear and mugs, as seen on tv products, and probably the most surly cashiers ever. After pillaging the sale rack for minutes we came up with these fine gems.

They may have won, but red looks better than blue.
We lost, but we had more fun.