Wait one cotton picking minute

I hate summer. I don't actually hate summer itself, but the things that go along with it. Sandals, shorts, muffin tops, and most of all allergies. Fuck do I hate allergies. I would cut off my left arm to not have allergies anymore. It's to bad that you don't get to chose what's wrong with you. Like if they gave you a choice between 2 things and you had to pick which one you could live with. Like if you had the choice between being deaf or blind, or having autism or down syndrome. Either choice isn't that great, but which one could you live with. I can just imagine how it would go...

"Congratulations Mrs. Maas you have a beautiful boy. Now we have a couple of options here. Option A is your son will grow up with severe allergies. He will never be able to eat nuts, shellfish, or other things, or be able to breathe properly. The one time he rides a horse he will end up in the hospital for over a week and have countless run ins with death throughout the years. He will also be one of those kids who has glasses in kindergarten, eczema, and a constant runny nose. Or, we have option B. You see, we found that all of these things can be cured by cutting off his left arm. Sure he may not have a left arm, but he will be able to breathe through his nose and eat peanut butter and lobster. The choice is yours"

Of course she would have left my arm on, but man it would be great to be able to breathe through my nose all the time.

-Pickle